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mindfulness

What I Learned on My Social Media Break

Happy New Year, dear Social Velocity readers! After taking almost 4 months away from the blog (and largely away from social media in general), today I’m jumping back in. I certainly haven’t figured it all out, but I feel I’ve given myself enough space to climb back into the fray.

But before I do, I want to say how incredibly touched I was by the outpouring of support I received from my last post about taking a blog hiatus. I received by far the most response emails, Tweets, messages, texts, and calls in the 9 years I’ve been writing the blog. I was completely blown away, not only that my own personal journey could resonate with so many other people, but also how incredibly supportive my readers are. I cannot thank you all enough for your resounding support for this journey I decided to take.

Among those emails, Tweets, messages, texts and calls were some great recommendations for books I should read. And I very much took those recommendations to heart. Because I am a diehard introvert, I do most of my exploration through the written word. So I have been voraciously devouring anything and everything that I think could give me some sort of guidance. Some of you have asked what books I have found helpful, so here are my favorites:

  • Brene Brown, Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone
  • Robert Wright, Why Buddhism is True
  • Thich Nhaat Hanh, The Art of Living
  • Tara Mohr, Playing Big: Practical Wisdom for Women Who Want to Speak Up, Create and Lead
  • David Lynch, Catching the Big Fish
  • Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now and A New Earth
  • Jen Sincero, You Are a Badass
  • Martha Beck, Finding Your Own North Star

So what has this break from the blog and social media given me? So very much!

With my newfound time I began to meditate everyday. I had done some meditation in the past, but very sporadically. Since I’m a Type A personality it is nearly impossible for me to sit still for any length of time, so I often found meditation to be excruciating. But last Fall I stumbled upon the Insight Timer app, and the endless variety of topics, teachers, lengths, and styles of meditations actually made it fun to do a daily meditation.

From the space of meditation and the new insights gleaned from the books I was reading, I began to realize that I need to spend less time each day “doing” and more time just “being.” That is to say that I needed to find time each day to put down the never-ending to-do list and just be still.

And I began to realize that it is in that stillness that our true efficacy lies.

If the chaos of 2017 taught us anything it is that the daily (sometimes hourly) assault on everything that we as progressive social changemakers hold dear can be soul-crushing. But reacting to it from a place of anger or fear gets us nowhere. Writer Robert Wright would seemingly agree when he argued recently that this moment in American history is an opportunity for us to stop reacting emotionally to the insanity swirling around us, and instead use “mindful resistance” to begin acting in a more effective way.

I had fallen into the trap of mindless reaction that he describes. I had unknowingly adopted a mode of reacting with frustration, anger, hopelessness, and confusion to each new horrific newsfeed item. This exhausting cycle of crushing news development, fueled by social media, followed by outrage is what finally convinced me to get off the social media train for a while.

But what if instead of being sucked into the seeming insanity that swirls around us, we social change leaders — those of use who seek a more just, equitable, and inclusive society — could take a big step back, get still, and determine a smart, thoughtful path forward. Instead of merely reacting to the cards we’ve been dealt, we could actually change the game altogether.

For example, the new tax law passed at the end of December could have negative implications for the nonprofit sector. Some predict that the increased standard tax deduction could encourage people not to itemize their deductions and thus give less money to nonprofits. But instead of reacting to this change with fear and anxiety, nonprofit leaders could take a breath and create a more strategic, thoughtful approach to their financial model. The new tax law is what it is, that ship has sailed. The best approach now is to accept the current reality and embrace the opportunity to get much smarter and more strategic about how you bring money in the door.

A thoughtful approach to the chaos that churns around us is not easy, and I don’t mean to suggest that it is. We live in uncertain times, and unfortunately we can’t control that. But we can control our approach to it. I strongly believe that for positive change to happen, we have to start with ourselves. And I know that 2018 will be, for me at least, a much more mindful year.

So in this new year, I look forward to exploring with you — my amazing, supportive, inspiring readers — how we can together create a more thoughtful approach to any challenges 2018 brings. And from that more thoughtful approach help lead a more hopeful, inclusive and inspired path forward.

Photo Credit: Justin Edgington

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